why did you lock the door??

I don’t want to distract you from continuing to view my previous post [over and over], but I must inform you about my morning.

I woke up after snoozing once [which was actually very upsetting because I’m currently trying to start “no-snooze” wake-ups].  Anywho, I put on some decent nanny pajamas and head to the bathroom before waking the kids up.  Now over here in Australia, most toliets are in there own room and then there’s another room for washing… they call it the wash room, for reasons I cannot comprehend.  So most toilet rooms are pretty small… ours is about 4 foot by 3 foot… I don’t know… it’s a really, really small room.

So I do my business, stand up, open the door… ohp, no, no… wait… I didn’t open the door, because the door wouldn’t open!

– Seriously?  I’m locked in the bathroom??

Marc, the dad, was gone off to work already and I was pretty sure no one else was awake.  So I locked the door, unlocked the door, tried to push the handle down again, tried again, tried again.

– I’m never going to get out of here.

– Raaaach?  Are you okay?

– Hazel!  I’m stuck in the bathroom!

– What??

– I can’t get out… Something’s wrong with the handle.

[laughing ensues on both sides of the door.]

– Seriously, I’m locked in the bathroom.

– I’ll go get a credit card or something.

So then Hazel slides the card under the door and I try, to no avail, to get the door open.  Oh, man.  Hazel and I laugh more and try to figure things until the mood suddenly changes…

– WHAT’S GOING ON???  WHAT’S THIS??  OH!  IS SHE LOCKED IN THE BATHROOM??

– Yes, Barbara!  I can’t get out!  [laughing.]

– Well, this is serious!  Oh, no this is bad.  I don’t know what to do!

– It’ll be okay.  Are there ary screws on your side on the handle?

– No!  Oh, no!  This is horrible!

– Yeah, mine either.  Can you try to bust the door in?  Or can I try?  Maybe can I try to force the handle??  It might break.

– NO!  NO DON’T BREAK THE DOOR!  RACHEL?!  WHY DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR??

– [hahahaha] I didn’t!

[by this point I can tell that Hazel has walked off because her mom is flipping out.]

– RACHEL?!  I THINK YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO STAY IN THERE!  OH, DEAR.  I’M GOING TO CALL MARC!

– Okay, yeah.  I think that’s a good idea.

– DO YOU USUALLY LOCK THE DOOR??  I NEVER LOCK THE DOOR!  WHY DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR THIS TIME?!

– Barbara, I did not lock the door.  I just went to the bathroom like I normally do… except I normally leave afterwards.

[she’s already heading downstairs to call Marc.]

– Hazzzeeeeeeel!  [I yell from my new torture chamber.]

– Yeaaah??

– Will you go wake up Craig and help him get ready?  Oh, and go in my room and bring me any thin reading material you can find.

– Okay!

Barbara frantically comes to the door to tell me that Marc’s coming back but won’t be here for another half hour.  She’s very panicked about the whole ordeal and I just can’t help laughing at the fact that I am locked in a windowless room that is built to hold only a toilet and an average sized person.

– I DON’T THINK WE’RE GOING TO BE ABLE TO GET YOU OUT!

I just start ignoring Barbara, which is a funny thing to do… because she knows I can hear her… it’s not like I went anywhere.

Then I continue to try and use the plastic card Hazel gave me to open the door.  I don’t understand how I could break into the Mountain Men’s apartment flawlessly with my school ID all through college for things like DVDs or cookies, but now I couldn’t break out of a bathroom to save my life.

So I sit on the toilet [seat down] for about a half hour before Marc gets back and tells me…

– Step back!  Make sure you’re back!!  Are you all the way to the back of the room?!?

I look around, look to the door, make an assessment, then swing my legs to one side of the toilet so I’m now sitting sideways…

– Yep, I’m back.

Marc kicked the door in and I was FREE!!  And it, somehow, didn’t even damage the door.

What an interesting morning.

My favorite part of the whole ordeal was Craig’s many questions throughout the morning…

– [downstairs eating breakfast] Why is Dad here?

– [looking at the bathroom door that has a note reading “DON’T USE!”] Why can’t we use the toilet?

– [on the way to school]  Are we late?  Why are we late?

All answered with…

– Craig, I was locked in the loo this morning.  Don’t you remember that??  I couldn’t get out?… Your dad had to come home and bust open the door?… Nothing?…. No?…. Really??