I’ve come into a habit.  When I drive my clients to the office in the morning, I sometimes take them for a quick drive down to the Elk Refuge… for the light… the breathing… the wildlife… but it depends… it depends on the music on the radio.  They know.  They ask…

– Do you like this song?

– Oh, I love this song.

– So, we’re going to see the big sheep?

– Yeah, let’s go for a drive down the Elk Refuge.

And this morning, I didn’t think it was going to happen.  I just wasn’t feeling it… until this song came on…

“please don’t forget how much I meant to you
when you are redefined by someone new”

[excuse the quality… download it to be your own.]

Gosh, I love Mason Jennings.  My favorite?  Maybe.  A connection.  A click.  I’ve been talking to a friend [a more… a sister] from Texas… I miss her.  We are so SO different… but we have things… we have love… we’ve always shared Mason Jennings.  This song made me miss/love/appreciate/laugh at/smile at her.

katy being awesome at one of her printmaking shows in portland... me stalking/loving her... hard.

Right when I moved back from Australia to Jackson, this song came on our community radio station, KHOL

I was with clients, driving… but, my goodness, it was familiar… it was right.  I pulled out my journal and wrote down…

“you’ve waited for forever and a day… just to die”

Kept looking back at it… meaning to look up the song and love it.

Heard it again today…

Laughed at myself.  Gosh, it is so beautiful… and I should’ve known.  One of the most beautiful beautifuls I know tried to introduce me to this song months and months ago…

dancing times: me, jimmy, amelia.

The day after this Australian fun, dancing, running-around night, Amelia sent me a link to this song [from this autralian band]… I’m sure I listened to it then… but I guess I didn’t need it then… didn’t even need it months ago… but today, oh today, it clicked.

[and, ugh, i miss amelia.]

Then this one.  Not a new one either.  [none of them are… i’m not hip, y’all.]  But today, ugh, I loved it.

Made me feel close to Emma.  A strong woman.  A young, creative, effing awesome woman… who inspires.  And AND she’s pregnant!  She stands up for herself, loves her work, knows her strength, finds her happiness and hits the streets runnin’ with it… every damn day.  Wanna be her?  Maybe.

All those things [those songs] clicked.  And they might not for you.  You might throw them aside, not need them as much as you need your busyness.  And that is okay.

We can still be friends.

But we will never be loves.

But I love you… you all.


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